Lazy garbage. I’m not sure this would have worked as the 2 hour film it was originally slated to be.

The reasons this doesn’t work are obvious: it’s tonally inconsistent, with gaping plot holes you could pilot a Death Star through, paper thin new characters, and (consequently) actors who struggle to portray them convincingly. It relies so heavily on nostalgia that it doesn’t bother to craft an original story. We’ve seen Obi-wan rescue Leia before (one episode in particular is an egregious re-telling of A New Hope). We’ve seen Obi-wan fight Vader before, and leave him defeated, but not dead. (One would think Obi-wan would learn from his mistake there, Jedi code or not. Of course, if Vader is defeated by his former master multiple times, does that mean he was not the chosen one? Like I said: plot holes.)

The real problem is one that has been simmering at Disney since people got mad about The Last Jedi: originality is banned at their studios. Instead: how many Spider-Men can they fit in one Spider-Man film? Did Obi-wan say that line? Look, it’s that actor returning from that other better movie! Can Dr. Strange meet Professor Xavier? Obviously this not the first time anybody has noticed this. But it’s more and more obvious that Disney eschews original storytelling and ambitious new ideas in favour of IP and nostalgia bait.

I am of the belief that nostalgia bait can be fine. Sentiment can be a useful creative tool, and obviously a good marketing one too. Mad Men is exclusively about sentiment, and relies entirely on nostalgia for a certain era. Without both, the show fails. And yet it remains one of television’s best shows. Toy Story 3 is entirely about nostalgia, but they didn’t forget to attach a darn great movie to it. The issue here is that Obi-wan Kenobi adds nothing to the films that bookend it, and if most fans were pressed, they would create better stories in their imagination about Obi-wan’s life during this time than the filmmakers did.

When I finished the show, I looked for a dislike button of any kind in Disney+, and realized that they don’t have one. They don’t need it. They have the brands you’re nostalgic for already. There’s no need to make something you like. They already bought everything you love. It seems like they’re only getting started sucking the life out of it.

I have a bad feeling about this.

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